


You are mine!

by Gloria0202



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Character, Cheating, F/F, F/M, Gen, Hate to Love, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Lexa, Jealousy, Lesbian Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-15
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2018-10-23 13:37:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10720386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloria0202/pseuds/Gloria0202
Summary: A repost!Lexa always meets Clarke in her sluty outfit.Another Clexa fanfiction with some of Grey's anatomy characters.





	1. Forest green and Sassy doctor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry this is not an update.
> 
> As I already mentionned, I wanted to rewrite and correct a few things in this story which is my first fanfiction. I hope to update twice a week if possible but I can't promise that I will do it because I have other Clexa fanfics now that I would like to finish too.
> 
> Notice that I kept the titles of the chapters the same and there is no major change in the storyline for the moment.  
> Whenever I change something in the plot line, I'll make sure to let you know at the beginning.
> 
> Enjoy reading and as always don't hesitate to let me know what you think.

* * *

* * *

 

_In the most mysterious game which is called life, we often cross path with people we don’t know. It happens a lot and most of the time it is insignificant but sometimes we get the chance to meet someone who would change our lives and this is how Clarke first met that person._

  

* * *

* * *

 

 _‘I need sex and a drink first,’_ Clarke thinks to herself while undoing the messy bun of blonde hair. She slides her fingers through her blonde curls lightly caressing her head after the exhausting couple of days she had.

She knows it is a terrible idea to be here, this place is too noisy for her because she spent the day in the OR fixing some bombing victims. She spent her night shift and her whole day around blood, scalpels, and screams _– a tense atmosphere –_ she needs a quiet place where she can relax.

Clarke usually drinks after such a stressful day and gets laid before sleeping all her day off before being capable to be a functioning human being. But tonight she is in this nightclub, overcrowded nightclub which also happens to be too loud for her but this is not about her.

This is about her best friend Raven. She came to this nightclub because her best friend told her that this is a famous nightclub she wanted to hang out with her at and Clarke could not again tell her no.

“Let’s dance, princess,” Raven screams through the loud beats of the music tugging Clarke towards the dancefloor with her.

Clarke follows Raven lazily, she knows better than to say no to her even if she does not want to be here. In addition to the fact that she misses her, they have not seen each other for a while.

Raven was a well-known party girl back in high school and through the years it only became worse especially after the drama she had to deal with. Debauchery became her way to deal with grief.

“Alright, just one dance. One and-” Clarke says but she does not get to finish when someone bumps her shoulder which not only interrupted her but even made her stop and lose Raven’s death grip on her wrist.

She turns around and looks at the person who bumped her but the light effects in the dark are toying with her vision and all she can see is a pair of the most beautiful forest green eyes staring back at her before disappearing in the darkness of the crowd.

“Yeah…sorry,” Clarke lets out sarcastically and turns back looking for Raven on the dancefloor and when she fails to find her she walks back to the bar where she left her purse with her friend Jasper.

“Jas! Please tell Rey that I left,” She says and receives just a nod from him before leaving.

Clarke finally finds solace in the cold breeze and the calm outside the nighclub’s doors and decides to walk back to her place instead of getting a taxi or an uber thinking that it might help her release all the stress that had built within her body the last three days.

In addition, her apartment is only a few blocks away. Apartment, not a home at least not anymore since her breakup with Melissa.

Melissa, the woman Clarke regrets now because she used to distress her. She used to go to her apartment and finds her waiting in bed for her. A comfortable bed and a hot girlfriend in it that is all Clarke ever needed.

She knows it is mostly her fault. Her work and her career were sucking her energy out of her, out of their relationship if it was ever one. Except for being once in a while physically present, Clarke never worked or done any effort to keep it alive and Melissa was tired to be the second choice of Clarke who prioritized her career over everything else.

“Hey! You forgot your jacket,” A voice brings Clarke back from her thoughts.

Green, the voice came from the woman with the breath taking forest green eyes.

Clarke takes her time appreciating the woman’s beautiful brown locks cascading her right shoulder then her gaze roams over her whole body, black leather jacket perfectly cut and skinny black jeans hugging her long legs deliciously before she looks back up at her plump lips who are curled in a barely noticeable smile but it is there and Clarke does not miss it.

“Are you ok?” The woman asks again with a worried expression. “Is it yours or your friend’s? Uh…hello there!”

Clarke feels her cheeks burning realizing that she was drooling over the woman and did not answer her, “Yeah…uh, it’s mine. I’m ok I think…am fine as I can be after a few drinks, loud music and going for more than 48 hours without sleep..."

It is only when the woman frowns confused by her rambling that Clarke realizes again that she is humiliating herself in front of a woman she would not mind having as a one night stand.

“Thank you,” Is all Clarke manages to say before the green eyed woman takes her breath away again by an accidental touch when handing her jacket back. The look in the woman’s green eyes sends shivers down her spine, she quickly wears her jacket and gives her hand for the woman to shake.

"Uh...see you around?” Clarke adds with a smile.

“May we meet again,” The woman replies before putting her safety helmet on and riding away with her bike leaving Clarke speechless.

 _‘May we meet again!’_ The words sound oddly familiar to Clarke yet so uncommon, she tries to remember when or where did she hear them but cannot.

She rubs her forehead and shakes her head she should not think that hard about a stranger’s words. It is probably because of the woman’s beauty and the fact that she did not get laid for a few days that she is so frustrated right now.

 

* * *

 

_It happens once in a while. You meet accidently someone and before you can ask them anything they disappear as suddenly as you met them just like it just happened to Clarke. However, sometimes it happens more than once._

 

* * *

 Clarke grabs her scrubs and rushes to put them before leaving a kiss on Callie's forehead, "Thanks, it was amazing. I needed it."

"Anytime FuckinGriffin but please next time no ear biting," Callie replies chuckling.

“Shut up! You loved it when I was rocking into you,” Clarke adds and leaves the on-call room before Callie says anything else.

It is not the first time neither the last one that Clarke falls in bed with Callie, her colleague and _~~her friend~~_ her fuck buddy. Everything is easier with her, no string attached, no responsibilities or dates and no drama. All Clarke needs after her not so successful relationship with Melissa.

Clarke runs through the hospital's alleys her eyes stuck to her cell phone, she knows the hospital as her own home. She doesn't bother looking, she knows where she is needed, and where her playground is.

She is a trauma surgeon. She loves her work, she loves the rush, she loves fixing people, she loves saving lives and all what comes with the trauma surgeon profession.

Clarke lives for her work.

"Hi, I am Dr.Griffin, what do we hav...Oh you again!"

The woman looks at Clarke as much surprised as her but quickly recovers and answers with a serious tone, “"It’s nothing. I just need some stitches and I will be ok."

Clarke looks down at the green eyed woman who does not seem so friendly like the previous day. _‘Who would with a huge cut on his arm?’_ Clarke thinks to herself.

"Let me check it first," Clarke replies seeing that the woman is clearly in pain which explains her shitty mood. She takes her forearm carefully and with so much tenderness that the brunette gets goose bumps at her touch.

Green eyes meet hers and Clarke smiles reassuringly. She unconsciously caresses the woman’s hand with her thumb while examining the cut and God she likes how her soft skin feels under her fingertips. Her thoughts run wild wondering about the taste of the brunette’s tanned skin.

The woman clears her throat. Again, their eyes meet and the world shutters around them. There is something in the woman’s green eyes Clarke cannot decipher, the woman is good enough to hide it. Clarke’s heart jolts in her chest when the woman’s gaze shift from her blue eyes to her pink lips. A smile forces its way to her lips without she can even control it.

“My cut,” Clarke is brought back to reality by the brunette's soft voice and the woman seems to notice the blush on her cheeks.

Clarke nods and looks back at the woman’s injury and this time doing her best to examine it and not getting distracted by anything about the brunette. Clarke feels the green eyes staring at her and it takes her a lot to not meet her eyes and just ask her on a date.

When she finally has an idea about the extent of the damage, the doctor in Clarke kicks in and she lets out seriously, “The good news is that your injury is not deep which means it did not reach the nerves or the main blood vessel. However, we’ll need to cl…” Clarke looks down at her pager before continuing, “clean it. It hurts and we’ll give you a few shots of Titanium before we can let you leave.”

As soon as she finishes, Clarke steps aside taking off her latex gloves and orders, “Monty, please take care of this. I’ve an emergency, my patient is coding.” Before her intern or the woman gets to place any word Clarke is running the other way.

“Hi there! I am Monty, and I am going to take care of you,” Monty gives the woman a reassuring smile but she seems not really in the mood.

“Don’t touch me,” She lets out firmly. “Are you even a doctor? How old are you?”

“I’m an intern indeed, not a doctor yet, but hopefully soon. I’m Dr.Griffin’s intern so you can trust me. I will fix your arm as good as new.”

The woman looks at him for a moment before sitting back and letting him approach her. Monty is one of the most promising interns. He had difficult beginnings with Griffin whose Nazi leader reputation precedes but throughout his first year he managed to earn her trust.

Clarke gets to the patient’s room, a little boy named Aden to whom she gave multiple surgeries two days ago when he got in the ER. She finds him sitting on the floor at the corner of the room, wrapped around himself sobbing and two of her interns trying to talk to him.

"What the hell is happened? Why is he…Aden, Aden look at me, it's me," The little boy does not raise his head but stops sobbing and tightens his arms around his legs even harder.

"I want Miss Robbins, she is my doctor now."

Clarke looks back at her interns questioningly not understanding who the hell is this Miss Robbins but when she sees that she is not going to get any answer from them now she looks back at him.

“Aden I know you’re scared but I am here. It’s me, Clarke. Let me help you, please?” Clarke’s voice is softer this time.

“Aden, it's not safe for you to be in this position. It may open up your sticthes and we’ll have to do it again and it will only last longer for you to heal and get back on your feet.”

“you can even have an internal bleeding by now. Please,” Clarke tries to be more eloquent so he can understand the risks knowing that the little boy is smart enough to understand.

Seeing that Aden is not willing to do what is best for him and that he is only tightening his arms around him and crying harder, Clarke glances at her interns once again who quickly leave the room then she takes a few steps back.

"Wait please! Don't...don’t leave me alone," The little boy finally looks up at her.

Clarke freezes and her heart melts at his words,  _‘Don’t leave me alone.’_

A few weeks ago, she uttered the same exact words herself for Melissa. She was broken, she needed her. She needed her human warmth. “Don't leave me alone, I need you Melissa."

_Melissa smiled at Clarke and with her watery eyes answered, "You don't need me Clarke, you need someone, you need a body, ain't a body. What about my needs Clarke, what about them?" Clarke froze speechless at how true Melissa's words sounded, speechless at how she didn't realize it until Melissa pointed it out._

"I’m not leaving you. I’m just going to close the door. I'm here, right here Aden," She reassures him and stays rooted silently in her spot waiting for him to do or say anything.

“I’m here just let me help you,” Clarke asks the little kid in a begging tone and it seems to do the trict as he gives her a slightly noticeable nod. Her words sound more trustworthy and powerful now that the door is closed and there is only the two of them.

Aden looks straight into her eyes. The emotions in his look are not so strange to her. As a trauma surgeon working on extreme cases, Clarke sees a lot of them _– pain and fear –_ and unfortunately she knows these two same emotions intimately on the personal level.

"Let me help you get up and check your stiches”

Aden finally takes her hand and lets her help him to get back on the bed. Clarke’s heart clenches when he winces. She does not know why she has a soft spot for her little patient. She already got to work with kids but she never cared for them as much as she cares for him.

After taking a look at his injuries, a blonde storms into the room and takes his file from Clarke’s hand before she can ever react. The woman who apparently is a doctor is now standing next to Clarke with a bright smile and totally ignoring Clarke’s look.

“Hey little human. I’m here, you’re ok” The woman says with her annoying voice that people often use to talk with kids.

When Aden smiles at her, Clarke looks back at her “I’m sorry, who are you?”

“Robbins. The new head of pediatrics, and you are?” The woman asks back with a smile.

“Griffin, trauma” Clarke replies then looks back at Aden before adding “It’s ok. His stitches are ok. I checked him”

“You can leave now” Dr.Robbins lets out and just as she is about to leave, Aden speaks” You said you won’t leave me”

"Aden my dear. I am here, there is no need to keep Dr.Griffin here I’m sure she has more urgent matters to deal with"

"It is ok I can stay for a-" Clarke does not even finish her sentence when her pager buzzes again "Uuh Aden, I will do my best to check on you later, Ok?"

"Go to your patients, Aden is in safe hands" Dr.Robbins interjects only sparking Clarke’s nerves.

Aden nods with a pout then watches her leaving. Clarke’s day in the ER is as usual rather busy but she made sure to check on Aden whenever she could and most of the time he would be asleep.

 

**********

 

"Hey princess, you want another quickie?" Callie murmurs behind Clarke.

“Not now, Torres. I’m too…argh for a quickie. And why the hell would you page me?”  Clarke sinks on the couch of the cafeteria.

"Want to dance it out then!" Callie suggests.

"No. Not even able to do it. I had a rough day, the kid Aden, the Sassy head of pediatrics…my other patients”

"Sassy? Come on Clarke you are the princess of Sassyland" Her friend quips.

"I know but this woman is just annoying" Clarke says before adding "speaking of the devil" Callie turns her head to look at the so called “ _Sassy head of Pediatrics_ ”

"Dr.Robbins! Is Aden ok?" Clarke asks worried.

"You may call me Arizona, we are friends now" The woman answers instead completely ignoring Clarke’s question before giving her hand to Callie with a huge smile on her face "Robbins, you are?"

"Callie, uh, Callieope Torres. Dr.Torres, Ortho but you can call me Callie" Callie replies nervously clearly mesmerized by the new Sassy doctor. She shamelessly stares at her and Clarke takes it as her clue to leave them be.

On her way to another on-call room, Clarke remembers the green eyed woman and she wonders what happened to her to deserve such a big and nasty cut on her forearm. She takes her phone and texts Monty hoping to get some information.

 

**_Dr.Griffin: Did you manage to do the stictches as I taught you?_ **

****

**_Monty: Yes. I just had trouble with that patient._ **

**_Monty: She was not easy to handle._ **

****

Clarke looks at her phone confused.

 

**_Dr.Griffin: ?_ **

****

**_Monty: She kept ‘ordering’ me how to do it._ **

****

Clarke smiles and types.

 

**_Dr.Griffin: Is she a doctor or what?_ **

****

**_Monty: No. Just the bossy type._ **

****

Instead of having more information from Monty, Clarke gets more puzzled and intrigued by that woman. It does not surprise Clarke ‘ _Clearly, Monty was too shy to get anything from her_ ’ She thinks.

The brunette is a hell of a woman, with a tall well sculpted body, and an intimidating look and posture while Monty was barely capable to speak with her on his first day in the hospital.

Clarke takes a nap but not a long one again the buzzing of her pager on the wooden table next to where she is laying wakes her up. She throws her hand over the table lazily half asleep and grabs it.

She whimpers when she sees that she is needed in the ER. She drags herself up, fixes her appearance quickly putting back on her scrubs’ top and fixes her hair in a tight bun before running back into her life or what is left of it. Her life can be summed up in running in the hospital hallways, ER, OR and meaningless sex in on-call rooms.

 

* * *

 

_When it happens again – a third time – it cannot be considered sudden or accidental because it clearly is something much more meaningful than just a coincidence._

_.This is how Clarke ends up meeting that person again in her life._

 

* * *

 

 

**_Raven: Where the hell are you Griffin?_ **

Clarke looks at her phone and a smile reaches her lips despite her fatigue. Again her phone buzzes in her hand.

 

**_Raven: I need you._ **

****

**_Clarkie: Heading home. Had a rough night._ **

****

**_Raven: Coming home._ **

****

**_Clarkie: Bring Chinese. I’m hungry af._ **

****

**_Raven: Who’s the best bestie in the world?_ **

****

_‘Typically Raven’_ Clarke thinks rolling her eyes before typing her reply.

 

**_Clarkie: You, Rey. Just bring the damn food._ **

****

When Clarke finally gets to her apartment, she finds Raven waiting for her in good company. Raven is too busy eye fucking a petite charming brunette who is standing way too close for someone she barely met and according to the way she is talking with her hands too, she obviously does not mind it.

"It will be my pleasure, we certainly need to party" Raven says to the brunette when Clarke steps closer.

“Hi” Clarke lets out and the brunette straightens her position discreetly taking a step back from Raven before greeting her back.

“Clarke! This is your new neighbor Octavia. Octavia this is Clarke my best friend, your neighbor"

"Welcome” Clarke says automatically then adds “I only crush here. I don’t have time to live and meet” She tries to explain and she clearly does not notice how harsh it came out.

Raven raises her eyebrow before interrupting “This is going to change, Clarkie. Octavia just invited us to her party along with some of your neighbors I’m sure you don’t even know. It’ll be a good start to _‘meet and live’_ “ She quotes her flashing a smile at the brunette.

“Thanks for the invitation, Octavia. We’ll be there” Clarke answering trying to be polite then looks at her best friend with a _‘I’ll kill you’_ look.

“I’ve to go now” Octavia replies before rushing to the elevator.

Clarke opens the door of her apartment and drops her handbag then strips all the way to the couch leaving all her clothes on the floor while Raven goes to grab beers from the kitchen.

The second Clarke’s head touches the couch she hears someone knocking on the door. She sighs and goes to open the door forgetting that she is almost naked. She opens the door in her underwears.

“Oh! Uh…sorry! I forgot to tell Raven that the party is tonight” Octavia stutters not expecting to see her neighbor naked then adds thinking that she was interrupting something “And sorry for interrupting”

Clarke listens to the brunette half asleep then watches her leave, she slams the door and walks back to the couch like a zombie and collapses on it when Raven gets back and sits next to her with the Chinese bag and coffee in one hand and a beer in the other one.

“Who was it?” She asks while helping Clarke with her food.

“The party is tonight” Clarke replies taking a sip from her beer before continuing “by the way Octavia might think that we’re fucking”

“What? Why?” Raven lets out shocked “For fuck’s sake, Claaarke”

“I’m tired to even speak….and explain” Clarke replies between bites while Raven is drinking her coffee. They talk for a few minutes catching up before Clarke excuses herself to the bathroom for a shower and Raven turns on the Tv.

A few hours later, Clarke wakes up to find her best friend straddling her.

“Wake up sleepy head…time to get ready”

“Sleep…tired” Clarke mutters sleepily.

“Claaaarkie! Wake up you really need a social life. You need _a life_ ” Raven insists shaking Clarke’s shoulders to make sure to wake her up.

“You bitch” Clarke shouts “Get off of me” She pushes her best friend away and flips on her stomach before hugging her pillow to drift back to sleep. Raven goes to the kitchen and gets her a coffee knowing that she might need it to save herself from being killed.

After a coffee and stirring in bed for a moment, Clarke watches Raven get in her room with a red tight dress doing the fashion walk, hands on her hips showing off her well-built body.

“Too much for a party at a friend’s neighbor, Rey” Clarke comments honestly.

“Come on, Clarke. I can’t get that hot girl by looking casual”

Clarke chuckles not believing that her best friend took the time to go grab a dress from her place just for a stupid neighbor’s party “Whatever, I’m not coming anyway to see you get humiliated”

“Hell no! There is no way I’m going alone. You’re her neighbor not me, can you imagine how weird will it sound” Raven replies then adds with a stupid voice “Hi, I’m Raven your next door neighbor’s _friend_ ”

Clarke laughs shaking her head “Still, I’m not going”

“Please!” Raven begs her with puppy eyes “You can’t deny me this, I owe you a lot”

“Fine! But I won’t stay for long, Raven. I really need to rest” Clarke answers and Raven jumps at her making her fall back on her bed and kisses her nose as they used to do back when they were young.

When Raven first met Clarke they were barely seven years old. They were in the same class but they did not talk to one another but when Raven found Clarke surrounded by older kids bullying her, she defended her things changed. They became friends then one entity always together.

Raven manages to get Clarke ready in no time before fixing her own makeup. Clarke takes the opportunity to tide up her room a little bit. She is not thrilled by the idea to be in an apartment filled with people, strangers more exactly and loud music.

 

_.Little do they know that this party is going to be a turning point in their lives._

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the mistakes, English is not my first language.


	2. Liquor is trouble, you are trouble.

 

Before even going to the party, Raven starts drinking and Clarke does not really appreciate it “Rey! Easy on the lhe liquor if you really want to get into Octavia’s pants” Clarke says knowingly.

“You’ll be there, I’ll be ok” Raven replies confidence in her tone.

“Yeah right! Just like the other night?” Clarke asks rhetorically and Raven blushes.

Clarke considers Raven as the sister she never had, her soulmate, her everything and her person. She used to sleep in her arms whenever she missed her deceased father and so does Raven when she is too broken.

However, Raven is different when coping with the death of her beloved ones. First, she drown her pain in liquor then began sleeping here and there with anyone, literally anyone.

 

**********

 

_“Claaarke! You’re hot” Raven snorts drunkenly then adds “I am hot…let’s you know be hot together”_

_“Raven, you’re drunk. Stop it” Clarke shouts at her best friend when she begins stripping her clothes._

_Raven stops and chuckles “You can’t handle this…me, Clarke? Or I’m not sexy enough for you to want me?”_

_“You know you are but you’re drunk as fuck and you’re like my sister. It’s…disgusting to even think about it” Clarke manages to argue despite being drunk too._

_“I’m not your sis! Gosh!” Raven defends throwing herself at her best friend before smashing her lips against Clarke’s._

_Clarke quickly tilts her head back breaking the kiss and tries to push Raven’s half naked body off of her “Raven, you’re drunk stop this shit” The words come harsher than intended and Clarke sees the pain in her eyes._

_Raven pulls back and looks away as hot tears start spilling down her cheeks “He left…he always wanted me, Clarke! Finn always wanted me”_

_Clarke pinches the bridge of her nose regretting her words, she should have known that this is about Finn and she should have known how to comfort her best friend with nicer reaction._

_“I miss him, I want him…but now he is gone and you don’t even want me, you too”_

_Clarke feels her heart aching for her best friend. She should have known that Raven needs her._

_Raven is both physically and emotionally stripped. She is weak while she never was, she was Clarke’s rock and now Clarke needs to be hers but she does not know how._

_Even after almost two years from her boyfriend’s sudden death, Raven had never expressed her pain not even to Clarke. She closed up and hid behind her fake coping using alcohol and one night stands._

_However, tonight Raven is pouring her heart out to Clarke and the latter finds herself clueless to how help her best friend._

_“I need warmth, human touch, Clarke!” Raven cries out before adding “do you know how hard it is to want to isolate yourself, being afraid of other’s people touch as if it will wash away the feeling of his last kiss…the feeling of his caress and yet crave some human contact, Clarke?”_

_“I need it” Raven adds before pausing a moment wiping her tears and finally looking at her best friend straight in her eyes “I fuck strangers but never let them touch me or kiss me”_

_“I..Raven” Clarke tries to interrupt but Raven does not let her “I need to feel someone’s loving touch, I need someone to ease my pain a little bit. I need to feel someone’s skin on mine. I want love, I want to be happy again, Clarke! I want you”_

_Clarke nods and wraps her arms around her best friend carefully afraid to scare her away and Raven instantly breaks in her arms. Clarke holds Raven who is crying in her arms then she feels her tugging at her dress._

_Without a second thought, Clarke undresses and so does Raven before Clarke wraps her arms around her and leaves a few tender kisses on her shoulder up to her neck trying to reassure her and let her know that she loves her and that she is there for her._

_“Kiss me” Raven asks her and Clarke hesitates “Are you sure?” She does not want to be the one who kisses Raven first after Finn. Raven kisses her as an answer and Clarke reciprocates. The kiss is soft and chaste but this is all Raven needed and Clarke gives it to her._

_A few minutes later, the two best friends are far asleep and wakes up the next morning almost in the same position they slept in, both naked holding each other._

_Raven wakes up first and as soon as she realizes that she woke up with her best friend and not a stranger she rushes out of the bed and puts her clothes on. Clarke wakes up next and watches her leaving without uttering a word._

_She knows Raven does not like to talk about her feelings, she knows Raven is a proud person who hates to look weak, broken and stupid so instead of stopping her and talking it through she lets her go._

_They never spoke about that night, it was not important anymore because all Clarke did was give Raven what she needed, the only thing Raven asked from her._

**********

 

For her best friend’s sake, Clarke agreed to go to her new neighbor’s party without mentioning that she was afraid that she gets too drunk and does anything stupid.

Unlike Raven who is perfectly dressed up, Clarke chooses a casual look for the party. Tight jeans and a white see through shirt showing her black lace bra and her amazing cleavage. She does not know what to expect, is it a house warming party? A regular party? All she knows is that she will be in an apartment by the end of the night full of drunk people and loud music.

Clarke huffs once they get to the door, just as she predicted the music can be heard even behind closed doors.

“How do I look?” Raven asks while knocking on the new neighbor’s door and Clarke rolls her eyes “Smoking hot, you’re going to break some hearts”

Raven smiles contently at her best friend and shakes her elbows “Let’s socialize a little bit”

“Yeah, let’s do that and easy on-“ Before Clarke finishes the door opens and Octavia greets them with a wide smile.

“Stay close” Clarke murmurs to her best friend.

“I’m glad you made it, welcome” Octavia pushes the door stepping aside gesturing for them to get in.

The two women step in, Clarke shyly hands Octavia a bottle of wine “I’m sorry, I didn’t know what to expect so I brought this. Hope it’ll do”

“It’s perfect” Octavia replies taking the bottle from Clarke before looking at her questioningly “Clarke, right?”

Clarke nods positively then looks around while Raven greets Octavia. The living-room is full of people, people Clarke does not know and have never seen before. She tries to focus on some faces trying to recognize at least someone she could have seen in the parking lot or the elevator but to no avail.

Octavia excuses herself and leaves them alone for a moment. Raven takes Clarke’s hand and walks her further in the living-room where people are mingling. Clarke looks around again then at her best friend “I shouldn’t be here”

“Come on, Clarke! We take at least one drink and we leave” Raven says and Clarke replies “Alright, one drink”

“Good, Octavia is coming” Raven comments and barely a few minutes later the younger brunette shows up with two drinks then asks them to follow her. Clarke walks behind Raven whose hand never leaving hers to make sure that Clarke will not disappear before at least trying.

Octavia stops next to a group of people who were animatedly chitchatting two men and a woman who had her back to them.

Octavia taps the woman’s back and says “Lexa, our next door neighbor is here”

The woman turns back and looks at her friend then her eyes meet blue for a second before eyeing Raven and her hand which is in Clarke’s.

Clarke feels her heart jolt in her chest when green eyes meet hers, she did not think she would see this woman ever again let along at a party of her new next door neighbor.

The green eyed woman does not seem to be fazed by Clarke as much as she is by her. She keeps her composure stiff and her shoulders straight, too straight for someone relaxing in a party. Raven smiles and greets them before being dragged away by the so called Octavia.

Clarke smiles awkwardly at them feeling out of place. She never was a good icebreaker nor was she ever fond of weird silence.

“Hi! I’m Alexandria Woods and this is my friend Gustus and my partner Lincoln, you are?”

Clarke’s jaw drops at the woman’s tone. She does not understand why this woman is being so bitchy comparing to the first time she met her, she does not understand why instead of telling her ‘ _Oh you’re the girl from the bar, the doctor’_ she acts like she never saw her. Clarke can’t help thinking ‘ _This “Alexandria” sure is not a friendly person_ ’

This “Alexandria” leaves Clarke speechless especially at the way she is looking at her expectantly with an arched eyebrow.

“Clarke Griffin” Clarke simply replies before looking away finally breaking the staring contest and it is only after embarrassing herself that the guy named Gustus offers her another drink which she politely refuses knowing that she should not get drunk otherwise she might regret it later especially that this woman is poking her nerves.

She looks around for Raven and sees that she is too absorbed by Octavia to notice that she desperately needs her. She tries to chitchat with Gustus who seems the only one to acknowledge her presence while “Alexandria” is talking to her partner the so called “Lincoln”.

Clarke does not miss the way Lincoln talks to the green eyed woman. If she was not facing her and see her lips moving, she would have not known. The music is loud and it is covering their apparently intimate conversation.

Alexandria this woman with the most beautiful green eyes Clarke has ever seen is engaged. It may explain the woman’s cold behavior, she is completely ignoring her. Clarke digs her hand in her pocket, gets her phone and texts Jasper.

 

**_Clarke: Where the hell are you?_ **

****

**_Jasper: Netflix ‘n’ chill ‘n ‘ a hot guy, you?_ **

****

**_Clarke: The most embarrassing situation ever!_ **

**_Clarke: Help!_ **

**_Clarke: Plz_ **

****

**_Jasper: Sorry! Not tonight._ **

**_Jasper: Superman too needs to get laid._ **

****

Clarke reads her friend’s last text and rolls her eyes, it is not the first time Jasper calls himself ‘ _Superman_ ’ just because he saved her once from a man in a bar who kept insisting even after ignoring him.

 

**_Clarke: Have fun :’(_ **

****

**_Jasper: Thanks._ **

****

Clarke sighs feeling tired and stuck in this apartment for Raven’s sake, Alexandria looks at her for a moment meeting her blue eyes. Clarke is clearly desperate she did not expect Jasper to let her down. She was hoping that she would politely excuse herself and leave with Jasper but it seems that she is not going to leave this awkward atmosphere so soon.

She looks away avoiding to stare too long into the green eyes and looks back at her phone and decides to just see if Callie can save her once again.

 

**_FuckinGriffin: Please tell me you’re not in the hospital!_ **

****

****

**_Callie: No, you?_ **

****

****

**_FuckinGriffin: Worse. Wanna come to my place?_ **

**_FuckinGriffin: It’s a booty call, yes._ **

****

****

**_Callie: Ok, be there in 10 minutes._ **

Clarke starts typing another text to Callie when Alexandria’s voice interrupts her “Anywhere you’ve to be?” It comes out harsher than the brunette meant it and before she adds anything else to rectify herself Clarke replies.

“Actually! Yes. Thank you guys for having me and sorry for bothering you with my presence” Clarke shoots back before leaving Alexandria and the two men speechless.

The truth is that Alexandria is jealous, jealous of whoever has Clarke’s attention in her phone. She wants to stare at Clarke’s blue eyes, and she was expecting Clarke to be more forward, friendly and talkative just like she seems to be. She did not understand why she was ignoring her while they had a moment and met ‘accidently’ so many times.

Indeed, she is a lively and friendly person especially in her element _– the hospital –_ but outside she seems a snobbish person just because she is too tired by the end of the day or night depending on her schedule.

Clarke walks to Raven with determined steps. It is just like she was expecting the party to be, a disaster. Especially for her since she was too tired to socialize let along being treated this way. The woman is engaged, it may explain her cold behavior but it does not explain her rudeness.

“You’re alone in this, I’m leaving” Clarke says once she is next to her best friend. Both Raven and Octavia looks questioningly at her.

“I’m sorry” Raven excuses herself before pulling Clarke apart and asks her “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Rey. I’m just tired…enjoy your night” Clarke lies. Raven looks hooked by the brunette ‘Octavia’ and Clarke does not want to ruin it for her.

“Thanks” Raven replies and kisses her.

“Welcome and thanks for inviting me, Octavia” Clarke says to her host before finally leaving.

In the other corner of the living-room both Lincoln and Gustus are confused by their friend’s temperament. Yes, she is not really good at opening up to strangers but she is never impolite or mean with anyone. In addition, Clarke seemed a nice person to them.

“What was that about, Lexa?” Lincoln asks first.

“Nothing. She’s just…annoying” Lexa replies not meeting his eyes.

“That was rude, Lexa even for me” Gustus adds and Lexa rolls her eyes nor wanting to admit that she really fucked up.

Lincoln looks at her with a raised eyebrow waiting for a better answer.

“I told you, she is just infuriating” Lexa poorly replies.

“Seriously, Lexa. Look at me” Lincoln insists.

“What? She is snobbish and -”

“You need to apologize next time you see her, she is your neighbor” Lincoln interrupts her.

“I saw the way you checked her out, your eyes bulged at her…you know” Gustus says cupping his two hands on his chest.

“How did I miss it?” Lincoln says “she is blonde and she has nice curves, your type”

“Shut up, Lincoln. She left anyway” Lexa lets out feeling her cheeks turning crimson red. They are right, she is her type and much more it is just that she could not help the words coming out of her mouth in rather a harsh tone.

“She’s your next door neighbor, that’s what O said” Gustus reminds her with a smirk “go get your girl”

“You need to get laid” Lincoln comments.

After a relentless friendly banter, Lexa admits her bad behavior and decides to go apologize and fix things with her ‘ _sexy neighbor_ ’ who caught her interest the first time she saw her the other night. She first asks Octavia who confirms that she is their next door neighbor and does not miss the way the brunette who came with Clarke is being handsy with her best friend Octavia.

“Can I take you Octavia for a moment?” Lexa asks politely and Raven smiles at her “Of course”

“Thank you” Lexa replies before pulling Octavia a few steps away from Raven.

“Is Clarke and Raven a couple?” She asks abruptly.

“Euh…No. who told you that?” Octavia asks back confused.

“No one, I’m just asking”

“She’s her best friend” Octavia clarifies.

“Great. She lives next door, right?”

“Yeah!”

As soon as, she heard her reply Lexa leaves her friend speechless in the apartment. Raven joins her and asks “Is something wrong?”

Octavia smiles at her and shakes her head “You’re just a tease!”

“Me?” Raven asks innocently.

“Yes. The way you look in this dress….is wow” Octavia admits shyly “and the way you’re looking at me now is-“ She bites her lip not knowing how to finish her sentence without being too forward.

“You’re not so bad yourself” Raven flirts back.

As Clarke predicted, Raven gets tipsy and so does Octavia. Raven could not keep herself from flirting with Clarke’s new neighbor. And Octavia could not resist her charms and invites Raven to bring their interaction to somewhere more private. The two women ends up spending the night together.

 

**********

 

Lexa is standing at Clarke’s door, she does not know if this is a good idea to talk to her so soon after being so rude to her. She collects all the strength she has left and tries to find her words before knocking on the blonde’s door.

She tells herself that the best option is to suggest a fresh new start after apologizing first of course for her unfriendly behavior and blame it on the liquor. She takes a deep breath and knocks on her door getting ready to do as she has planned.

However, what Lexa did not expect is Clarke opening the door wearing only a sexy black lingerie contrasting her creamy skin making it look sexy. Her jaw drops and she loses her words when Clarke clears her throat trying to get her attention back up to her face and not on her body.

“I…I came to-“ Lexa says but she is interrupted by Callie’s voice coming from the inside of Clarke’s apartment “Claaarke! You’re trouble, come back here”

“I’m sorry for interrupting. I’ll come back tomorrow or…never” Lexa says feeling embarrassed.

“Yeah, it’s better” Clarke replies and slams the door. It might have seem harsh but she could not stand there in sexy lingerie while the rude Alexandria was staring at her.

Lexa freezes at Clarke’s reaction, maybe she deserved such an unwelcoming behavior despite the very inviting look.

She cannot help thinking at the words she heard _–_ You’re _trouble –_ ‘ _She sure is_ ’ Lexa thinks.

  
_.This night is a mess_.


	3. A mess is what it is

 

  
Raven wakes up to a severe headache, she tries to open her eyes but fails in the first attempt. She is having a hangover but it does not prevent her from realizing the mistake she made last night, the whole night.

She slept with the only woman who caught her interest enough to want something with her, she slept with Octavia and ruined everything. She opens her eyes for the second time and she is in awe at the stunning sight of Octavia's angelic body, sleeping on her stomach, body naked with silky grey sheets barely covering her ass.

Raven traces her gaze from the woman's ass up to her back, then to her beautiful face which is covered by her hair, and her lips are slightly parted. Her breathing and the sound of her light snoring put a smile on Raven's face for a brief moment.

But she quickly sneaks out of the bed, puts her dress on then grabs her shoes and leaves the room. She tries to ignore the confused look Lexa gives her and leaves the apartment before wearing her shoes and leaving the whole building.

She disappears just like she got used to do – disappearing – the thing she became really good at after Finn’s death. She leaves whenever it gets hard, she disappears whenever it gets weird and she escapes whenever she feels something because she is afraid. Afraid of so many things.

It is only an hour later that Octavia wakes up to an empty bed, she looks around her bedroom and notices that her one night stand is gone and so are her clothes. It is better since she is not ready to admit that she had the best sex in her life. Hell she is not even ready to admit that she had sex with a ‘ _woman’_ which is unusual for her considering the fact that she is straight and she is dating Lincoln.

“Fuck! Lincoln” Octavia blurs out and storms out of her bedroom wrapped in her grey sheet which is barely covering her properly. She finds Lexa sipping her coffee on the couch and the living-room all cleaned which does not surprise her since she knows her roommate is a clean freak.

“Lincoln?” She asks abruptly.

“Morning Lexa. _Morning Octavia_ ” Lexa makes the conversation with herself sarcastically.

“Lexa, please!” Octavia pouts.

“He left after you decided to get all handsy and flirt with Raven” Lexa finally answers before adding in a serious tone “You better fix it”

“And Raven?” Octavia ignores her best friend’s threat and asks again.

“Left an hour ago” Lexa replies then adds “without a word”

“Oh my God! I’m a mess”

“The party was a mess, yes I agree. It took me forever to clean the house. The whole idea of throwing a party in our freshly painted apartment is a stupid idea and I told you”

“It wasn’t. I’m…I was, I slept with a woman and Lincoln…God! What did I do”

“You just said it! You slept with a woman” Lexa replies seriously before explaining again why they should have not thrown a party in the apartment they just moved in.

“I own a nightclub Octavia! What’s the purpose of having a party at home?” She asks rethorically before looking at her best friend who is now sitting next to her on the couch face buried in her hands “I always knew you were bicurious”

“Shut up, Lexa! Don’t start the ‘ _I told you so_ ’ speech and the ‘ _I know everything, I’m perfect_ ’ cause you’re not helping”

“Relax, I’m a mess too. At least I was yesterday. The blonde doctor, Clarke! I fucked up things with her” Lexa confesses.

“And?”

“That’s all. I mean…I tried to fix it and apologize but she was naked and I think she was busy so I lost my words…I gawked at her for a moment then she said I’m interrupting and slammed the door on my face”

“Sounds familiar” Octavia replies “I saw her in her underswears and she slammed the door at me too”

Lexa almost chokes at her coffee when hearing Octavia’s words. This Clarke must be a hell of a woman.

“She was not alone though” Lexa adds.

“Yeah, neither when I saw her. She was with Raven” Octavia replies before remembering Raven “Fuck, I had an interesting night. She is…interesting, tough yet so sweet and caring”

“Spare me the details of your sex life” Lexa comments taking another sip from her coffee and adding “Before you do anything at all with that woman, fix it. You owe him a talk and I don’t need my best friend to be all weird and awkward with my partner, do you understand?”

“I will see him tonight” Octavia promises.

“Ok, he’ll be busy this morning anyway, I need to do some shopping with him” Lexa says before taking her coffee and leaving Octavia thoughtful on the couch.

The second Lexa gets in the elevator, a brunette walks out of Clarke’s apartment and waves at her to wait for her. Lexa stops pushes her hand against the elevator and waits for Callie to get in.

Callie gets in and thanks her then picks up her phone “ _Hey…emmm, yeah thanks. You?..sorry, can we just try it later, I mean a date. Are you interested in a dinner date with me the sexy Dr Torres?....great! see you tonight_ ”

Lexa looks at the brunette confused, it is not in her habits or interest to eardrop but that woman did not really give her any other choice. In addition, she just spent the night with Clarke her neighbor, her sexy neighbor and now she is talking about a date with someone else.

She tries not to think about the sexy neighbor especially after what happened with her last night. Not only did she interrupt her in bed but she zoned out and stared at her shamelessly.

‘ _It is not just a mess, it is a fucked up mess’_ Lexa can’t help thinking about Clarke. This woman confuses her to no end. She showed up at her apartment hands interlaced with Raven looking like a couple than the latter spends the night with her best friend Octavia while Clarke spends it with a fellow doctor who wakes up the next morning and leaves setting another date for the night.

If she ever tried anything last night and things went well with Clarke, where or what is she going to be among this mess?

Lexa drives to Lincoln’s place and picks him up for their routine shopping day. She tries to push Clarke out of her thoughts and concentrate in doing her errands with Lincoln who is listing all the things they needed to replace, some lights, decorations and so on.

 

\-------

 

 

After Lexa left, Octavia tried to be a functioning human being despite the hungover and the mess she woke up to. She takes a shower then starts cleaning her room when she finds Raven’s underwear. She bites her lip remembering the very moment she stripped Raven’s underwear.

She knows that she needs to talk to Lincoln but what will she tell him when she has no idea what last night was for her or for Raven. Is it a one night stand? It is the first time she has been with a girl and she doubts it is the same for Raven. If it is something more than just sex, Raven would not have bothered waking up earlier and leaving without a word.

Octavia can’t help thinking about Raven’s body in her red dress and how irresistible she looks in it. Her cheeks turn crimson red at the memory of Raven naked in her bedroom and how she boldly made love to her.

Exactly, she made love to her all night long. It was not sex, Raven was tender. She was lovely, gentle and affectionate about pleasing her more than anyone has ever been with her.

She felt like Raven made love to her and it felt right even if she was shy herself and barely reciprocated. No man had ever treated her body the way Raven did. No man paid attention to her moans. No man ever understood her body language in bed like Raven did last night.

Octavia comes back from her thoughts and urges herself to clean her sheets and Raven’s underwear she needs to give it back which will give her an excuse to see the woman again hoping to get her number from her best friend Clarke later.

But first she needs to have a serious talk with Lincoln about their relationship.

Lincoln is a gentleman. He easily courted her, he did not try to jump in her pants. He is a good guy and he likes her _a lot_. She knows it, she feels it in the way he treats her and there is something in the way he looks at her sometimes that can be love.

However, what she had last night with Raven was much more. She realizes that she did not have that easy affinity and attraction for Lincoln as she had with her. It was instinctive and she did not feel like she is with a stranger. She never felt that with a woman, she never wanted a woman as bad as she wanted Raven the minute she met her at Clarke’s door waiting.

Now she thinks about it, she never wanted anyone neither a man, nor a woman as bad as she wanted Raven and she has to explain it to Lincoln tonight

 

 

* * *

 

 

Clarke wakes up feeling a little bit better than the previous day. She had sex and a good night of sleep and now she can spend her whole day off relaxing but of course Clarke will not do that. She promised to check on Aden her little patient whenever she can and promised him that she will bring him something.

She buys him his favorite chocolate and a sketch book with a few crayons to help him spend his time in a less boring company.

“Hi there!” Clarke gets in Aden’s room, sits next to him on the bed and hands him the little bag.

“Morning Dr.Griffin and thank you” Aden replies politely “This is for me?”

“Of course it’s for you” Clarke chuckles then encourages him to open the bag and check what there is in it.

He opens the bag and finds the sketch book and a set of pencils and crayons. The look in his eyes brings a smile to Clarke’s face.

“I saw you drawing invisible patterns on your lap the other day and I thought that they may be useful”

“Yeah, I love drawing but I’m not really good at it” Aden replies shyly.

“Have you ever took drawing classes?” Clarke asks and Aden shakes his head “Mom was going to pay me art classes when she saw that I sketch better than her but then-“ Aden stops midsentence and looks away not meeting Clarke’s eyes.

Clarke does not miss the way Aden’s eyes fill with tears, she feels her heart ache for the little boy he might be joyful but he already went through a lot and it is obvious without mentioning that his mother is still in intensive care in the same hospital and he is not allowed to see her.

“Hey it’s ok. You’re safe, everything is going to be ok” Clarke tries to reassure the little boy.

At Clarke’s words Aden’s tears spill down her cheeks, Clarke rushes to his side scooting closer on the bed and cups his little face in her hands and wipes his tears trying to comfort him when Dr.Robbins walks in the room.

“Here we go again, what did you do, Dr.Griffin?” Dr.Robbins lets out then looks at Aden and asks him “What’s wrong, Aden?”

Aden does not say a word he simply shakes his head and wipes his own tears.

“May I have a word with you Dr.Griffin?” Dr.Robbins asks sternly and Clarke nods before leaving the room.

“Dr.Robbins!”

“Aden is my patient and I don’t appreciate your visits that seems to tear him apart instead of helping him getting better”

“He was my patient, still is whether you like it or not Dr.Robbins. He was fine before you came out of nowhere and-“ Clarke defends but she is interrupted by a friendly tap on her back.

It is Callie who saw her friend and came to see if she can help knowing that Clarke is not easily fazed and when she looks that agitated it means that she is about to do or say something she probably should not.

“Clarke calm down” Callie lets out softly her hand never leaving Clarke’s back then she looks at Dr.Robbins and realizes that this is the sassy doctor Clarke told her about.

“What’s going on?” Callie asks both of them but neither of them answer, and a weird silence settles between the fellow doctors.

Dr.Robbins is the first one to break the awkward silence with an unexpected question “Are you guys together or something?”

Clarke blushes and looks away while Callie’s eyes widen at the woman’s bold question when Dr.Robbins continues “You know people talk, here at work. They talk a lot so for the sake of being honest I should tell you that I know things about you two”

Clarke walks away leaving Callie who is looking questioningly at Dr.Robbins “especially you Callie because people talk” She shrugs.

“Oh, right!” Callie breathes out feeling embarrassed then adds “You shouldn’t…listen to what people say, Dr.Robbins. Clarke and I…we’re friends. Just friends” Callie replies.

“Do you often have sex with your co-workers in on-call rooms? Is that a thing here?” Dr.Robbins asks abruptly.

Callie frowns confused at the woman’s attacks on her, she does not understand what she did to her or what Clarke did to deserve impertinent questions about their private life.

Dr.Robbins waits for Callie to reply and when she understands that she is not going to get any answer and realizes that she should have not attacked the two women like that she walks back to Aden’s room but Callie is quick enough and grabs her wrists stopping her form leaving.

“I don’t know what I did or say to upset you…I don’t know what you think or heard, all I know is that it may be confusing but it is not who I am-”

“I probably should mind my own business, I know” Dr.Robbins interjects.

Callie chuckles nervously “Dr.Robbins it is your business”

“Call me Arizona” The blonde replies before asking “what do you mean?”

“I mean it’s your business since I’m asking you out for a date” Callie adds confidently with a smirk “I’m not good at it, I don’t like to get attached but I really want to try”

Arizona’s eyes widen at her words “date?”

“Yeah, tonight?” Callie pushes her luck.

“What about Dr.Griffin?”

“Clarke?” Callie asks confused and Arizona nods.

“She is a friend, I told you we’re just friends and colleagues” Callie says.

“But you still sleep with her” Arizona points out knowingly.

“Well, I won’t if I am dating” Callie shrugs.

“Alright, Callie. See you tomorrow for dinner. Your treat” Arizona says before going back to Aden’s room.

Callie takes her phone and texts Clarke instantly, they need to stop screwing around. She needs to give it a shot since Arizona is willing to go on a date with her.

 

**_Callie: We need to talk._ **

 

Callie waits for a few minutes for Clarke’s answer but receives nothing. She makes a note to herself to step by Clarke’s apartment by the end of the day.

  
**_Callie: See you tonight._**

****

****

* * *

 

 

_Later that day…_

 

Lexa is arranging the bottles on the shelves when Octavia steps in “Hi! Is Lincoln here?”

Lexa looks at the direction of the nightclub’s VIP room where Lincoln is fixing something standing on a stool. Octavia looks at him and takes a deep breath before walking to him. She is going to need all her strength to do it.

She walks clicking her high heels purposely announcing her arrival to not startle him. Lincoln knows very well who it is without bothering looking. In fact, he does not think that he can look at her so soon. She hurt him, hurt his feelings, betrayed him and hurt his pride.

“Lincoln” Octavia lets out softly hoping to get his attention. Lincoln realizes that he needs to step down from the stool and eventually talk to her, he turns back and looks at Lexa who quickly takes her keys and leaves them alone.

Octavia does not know if Lexa leaving makes her more comfortable or less, she fidgets nervously with her keys waiting for Lincoln to look at her so they can talk.

She does not know how she got to this moment. The thing is Lincoln was her friend first even if he liked her a lot but he could not ask her out respecting her relationship despite how abusive that relationship was Lincoln never told her about his feelings until one day.

**********

_Octavia is sitting awkwardly in the corner of the nightclub whereas usually she is a lively person who loves to dance, dance is her passion. But tonight, she was not seen on the dance floor even though it has been rather a busy night, Saturday nights are well known in the Grounder’s nightclub._

_She remains there, alone in her bubble until the nightclub is empty except for one of the owners is left there Lincoln, her friend. Lincoln did notice Octavia’s weird silence but he was busy helping._

_“Hey little mess, are you ok?”_

_Octavia lifts her head up to look at him and her hair falls all over her face covering it like a tent. Lincoln approaches her and pushes a strand of her brown hair from her face and finds her face all bruised, eyes swollen and lips busted._

_“That bastard! Where is he, Octavia?_   _Where.the.hell.is.he? He did this to you? Answer me O, where is he?” Lincoln’s hand is tightly curled in a fist, he tries to control himself. He tries not to yell at Octavia but he can’t help himself. He loves her and he cares for her._

_Octavia puts her hand on his own hand which is now cupping delicately her bruised face “It doesn’t matter anymore, Linc. He left the country by now”_

_At her own words, tears spill down her cheeks making her wince and Lincoln’s heart shatters at the sight. The only girl he cares about is hurt and seeing her crying is something he never thought he would have to witness one day. Who dares to make such beautiful eyes cry? Who has the heart to sadden this lively creature?_

_“I am here, you’re safe. Do you hear me? You’re safe, he won’t touch you ever again, no one ever will, I promise” Lincoln says before hugging her tightly against his chest for a while letting her cry her pain away knowing that she needs it._

_They stay in the same position for a while until he feels her relaxing into his arms. She falls asleep and a few minutes later he carries to the VIP room and puts her on the couch. As he is about to leave she tugs at his shirt to keep him close and kisses him eyes closed then breathes out a weak “thank you” against his lips._

 

**********

 

“Before you say anything at all I need to know something, O” Lincoln breaks the silence first.

Octavia bites the inside of her cheeks nervously and nods looking everywhere but in his eyes.

Lincoln steps down the stool and sits next on the couch and taps it gesturing for her to join him. Octavia does hoping that Lincoln is not about to tell her something, a few words that she cannot reciprocate as genuinely as him.

“I loved you, I love you Octavia. And I know you don’t feel the same but- O look at me” Lincoln puts his hand on hers trying to get her attention. He wants to tell her and ask her something and he wants to do it looking straight into her eyes. Octavia finally meets his eyes and could see the pain and hurt in his eyes.

“I don’t know what you’re going to tell me or decide but I don’t want you to be with me because I love you…don’t feel obliged to reciprocate. Don’t feel weird around me because I have feelings for you…I love you and I am sorry for rushing you into a relationship, into this, you clearly wasn’t ready but my heart was taking the lead”

Lincoln pauses a moment taking a deep breath to not let the pain show in his voice before continuing “I should have known better and keep my hands for myself. I’m sorry I can’t help feeling this way. I don’t wanna lose you”

Octavia feels her heart tearing apart at his words she nods and tries to keep the unshed tears in her eyes, avoiding to blink when Lincoln smiles weakly at her and adds “I don’t want to lose what we have, I don’t want to break my promise. I will always be there for you Octavia, I’ll always protect you no matter what”

“I’m sorry” Octavia lets out in a whisper not trusting her voice. She scoots closer to her friend and wraps her arms around him “Thank you” She whispers again before kissing his cheek.

Lincoln closes his eyes tightly to survive her lips on his skin for the last time, her kiss pains him more than comforts him. He pulls back and takes a deep breath before asking her “Did you ever love me?”

His question hits her hard “I…I care for you, Lincoln”

“This is not what I asked” Lincoln smiles weakly. Octavia looks down at her hands before answering “I love you but I’m not in love with you”

Lincoln does not say anything, he lets her words fall in before looking away when Octavia speaks again “Thank you, Lincoln. Thank you for being who you are. My friend, my protector. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me and I’m sorry for never letting you know that I love you. Yes, I do but not the way you love me…I don’t think I deserve-“

“You do” Lincoln interjects.

“Don’t say that” Octavia shakes her head “I’m sorry for what I did. I hurt you, I hope you’ll forgive me. I just…you know me Lincoln I don’t cheat but she…she is something else and I felt something I never did before and-“

“Don’t, O” Lincoln interrupts her again “Please! I don’t think I’m ready yet to hear you talk about her”

“Fuck! Right” Octavia lets out “I’m sorry”

“Me too” Lincoln replies.

 

* * *

 

 

By the time Lexa gets home it is already sunset, she stops in the hallway and looks at Clarke’s apartment. It is silent, she thinks about her for a moment about trying again. She wants to know her but they are from two opposite worlds, she doubts they can be friends or something else so she resumes her path and gets in her apartment. She changes in her black sport shorts and leaves for a run she thinks she needs to help her relax later.

About two hours later, the darkness that has already covered the sky is Lexa’s cue to get back home shower and get ready for work. This time when she stops to take out her keys from her pocket she notices a light coming from under Clarke’s door, she hesitates for a moment then walks towards Clarke’s apartment and knocks.

Clarke’s voice can be heard through the door “ _coming_ ” she opens the door and without looking she rushes back to her kitchen and keeps talking “Be quick Callie, I am having Raven and Jasper for dinner, if you wanna join…”.

Clarke is once again in light clothes, she is in her underwear, a light pink women boxers showing her round butt cheeks, a matching bra, and a red lace knot around her waist of a tiny apron with her hair in a high messy bun.

Lexa is speechless jaw dropped, her eyes are glued to Clarke’s body but she quickly regains her self-control as she steps in and closes the door behind her to avoid that someone sees Clarke like she just saw her in her sexy outfit. Clarke by now is at the oven, taking the tray out when she hears a voice which obviously is not Callie’s.

“Is it a thing, is it your thing? Wearing this and slamming or opening doors to people?” Lexa blurs out.

“God, I thought it’s Callie. Who let-” Clarke asks back angrily then when her eyes fall on Lexa’s body she stutters.

Lexa is standing in sport shorts, skin still glittering from the sweat of her work out, hair tight in a high ponytail showing her bare neck, her perfect shoulders and her magnificent sharp jawline showing along with her little delicious ears that Clarke wants to nip. Her plum lips slightly parted and her thin fingers playing nervously with the keys in her hands.

The discreet smile on Lexa’s lips wakes Clarke up from her daydreaming and she opens her mouth to say something but nothing comes out, instead Lexa asks again “Is it?”

“What?”

“I was wondering if it was your thing to live in your underwears and slam the door at strangers, it’s pretty but rude you know!!” Lexa says.

Clarke does not appreciate the brunette’s words and takes it like an insult, she gives her a death glare and replies “You know what’s **rude** Alexandria? Walk in **my** apartment **uninvited** , judging me saying that I am slut, wearing nothing but underwear and slamming doors while clearly I am home. What’s rude is acting like you never saw me before, or telling to one of your guests ‘ _Anywhere you need to be?_ ’

“Let me tell you something that maybe news to you. I wasn’t thrilled to come to your party neither, the feeling was mutual. I came for my best friend because clearly she’s into Octavia and what is rude Alexandria is to fucking ruin my best friend while she is still a mess. Octavia shouldn’t have slept with her. The only ones who are rude here are you and your friend. How come such a nice guy as Lincoln is even engaged to you?”

“Uh! No” Lexa tries to answer to the confusing speech Clarke just threw at her but fails to. Clarke does not even give her the chance to when she hurries to the door, opens it and waves for her to leave “Just leave”

Lexa nods and takes a few steps back and finds herself outside Clarke’s apartment, she barely have the time to turn to face Clarke when the door is again slammed right at her face.

“I am sorry” Lexa says to the door.

 


	4. Pizza and post-it (part 1)

* * *

 

 

Clarke is taking a shower, she lets her body relax under the hot water cascading on her skin, she was feeling tense and angry after the moment she had with the annoying yet the so sexy woman Alexandria. In addition, she needs to relax before receiving her friends for dinner.

She thinks about how amazingly the annoying woman’s body looked in the sport shorts, her tanned skin sweat glittering and how gladly her tongue will venture on it, exploring each curs and each toned muscle. Clarke feels a tightening in her abdomen and a heat building down between her thighs. She imagines how it would feel like to have Alexandria’s skin against her own, how it would feel amazingly good to have her inside of her while staring at her beautiful green eyes.

She would not mind having her anger out on the brunette’s body and have rough sex with such a wild beauty. She would without hesitation nip Alexandria’s ear.

Clarke fantasizes about Alexandria and gets lost in the moment, pushing her hand down to her center which is soaked by now thanks to the picture of Alexandria curling her thin exquisite fingers inside of her.

Few doors away _– at the enemy’s territory –_ the same scene takes place after Lexa gets into her own apartment even more frustrated than before she went out for a run thanks to the so called Clarke.

She couldn’t fathom neither her luck with this woman, nor the weird circumstances that kept reuniting them that somehow always ended in a quarrel. She puts her ipod, and keys on the table, undress and gets in the shower.

The image of Clarke’s creamy skin still in her mind, she wanted nothing but to trace her tongue along Clarke’s curves and have a taste of the delicious looking butt chins of the woman. She closes her eyes firmly, and lets her imagination flow.

Lexa does not like pleasuring herself – it makes her feel desperate – but she does not know what to do when being alone and so turned on by the excruciating blonde neighbor. She slides her hand down to where she needs it the most. She did not get laid for a few months now and the teasing she gets from Clarke is so much more than she can handle. She climaxes not once, but twice before actually showering and getting ready for work.

Clarke is still in her shower when she hears the door ring echoing in her apartment. It must be Jasper and his new boyfriend or Callie, Raven is always late. She could not even come and now she is wrapping a towel and she runs to open the door for her guests.

The moment she opens it, Lexa walks out of her apartment and looks at her from head to toes and for a brief second their eyes meet, green staring into darkened blue. Clarke feels like the woman looking at her knows exactly what she has been doing while thinking of her.

She feels her heart racing into her ribcage, she averts her eyes and looks at Callie who grins at her remarkably red cheeks and points out “Oh well FuckiGriffin you started without me?”

Clarke looks back at Lexa to see her reaction to Callie’s words but the brunette is already walking to the elevator to leave. Again, destiny shows Clarke in her slut mode whether she likes it or not, she cannot blame the woman for thinking that way now.

Clarke squeezes her eyes close embarrassingly and answers “Shut up and come in” Then she slams the door once again but not willingly, her nerves got the best of her and when she pushed the door she did it nervously.

_Fuck it._

Callie did not have the time to properly have a serious talk with Clarke about their fuck buddies status as Clarke got back into the shower and by the time she finished, her other friends were all waiting for her in the living room.

The dinner was awkward, Jasper came with his new boyfriend who is Monty Clarke’s intern. The surprise in Clarke’s face was incontestably funny which lightened the atmosphere eliciting a collective laughter of her guests and Monty felt more welcomed among their group.

Clarke forgot about the incident that happened earlier with her neighbor Alexandria as she was preoccupied by Raven’s silence during the whole evening, she knew she had to ask her to stay for the night so they can talk it out.

She could tell that Raven was feeling down and that she needed to talk, yet Callie also wanted to talk to her about something but ended up leaving her apartment drunk with Monty and Jasper who kindly proposed to drive her back to her place.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lexa drives back to her work, she turns the music on and tries to busy her thoughts far enough from the sexy blonde she just saw naked wrapped only in a towel. On her way, she hopes that Lincoln and Octavia figured out their issue by now because she does not want to walk in drama at work. She did not get any text or call from neither of them and Octavia did not come back home.

As soon as she gets in the nightclub, she looks for Octavia to see how things went with Lincioln and to talk to her about the woman she slept with the previous night, Raven and inform her about Clarke’s worried words.

She finds her at the bar having a beer and looking straight at the dance floor which is still empty as the night is young but she does not miss how lost in her thoughts she looks. Lexa looks at Lincoln who seems rather fine nothing alarming except for the sparkle in his eyes which was missing, she smiles at him and walks towards Octavia.

“Hi there, you ok?” Lexa asks in a soft voice. Octavia looks at her and smiles dimly “Yeah”

“Need another beer?” Lexa suggests looking at Octavia’s empty beer.

“No, I am ok. I’m leaving anyway, I need to have a clear mind. I’ve an audition tomorrow”

“Wait, O! I need to talk to you about Raven”

“What?” Octavia lets out worried startled “did she ask for me?”

“No, calm down. It’s just that her friend Clarke told me that she’s a mess and that you shouldn’t have slept with her” Lexa replies and Octavia looks away not daring to look into her friend’s eyes.

“It explains why she snuck out early in the morning. I mean you should talk to her, figure out what you want and talk to her. Don’t use her”

Octavia looks back at Lexa feeling hurt at her last words “Listen, Lexa. I don’t even know what happened to me, I didn’t use her and I never will. I know I shouldn’t have slept with her, I shouldn’t have flirted back because I hurt Lincoln in the process but believe me I’m as much of a mess as she is and probably ever more”

“…you know I’ve never been attracted to women, not like with her so please don’t you think that I’m playing her or using her” Octavia says eyes filled with unshed tears then adds before leaving “I’ll talk to her Lexa, just not now”

 

**********

 

By the end of the night, Lincoln notices that Lexa is thoughtful and silent more than usual. He joins her with two beers in his hand to talk to her and see what is in her mind “What’s up?”

“Nothing” Lexa replies startled.

“Well, you look frustrated. Did anything happen?”

“No, I should be the one asking you this” Lexa replies.

“Yeah but there’s nothing much to say, I told Octavia the three words and we broke up. Now tell me what’s going on with you?” Lincoln replies.

Lexa looks into her friend’s eyes and realizes that he does not want to talk about Octavia or how he is feeling after a so sudden break up, so she decides to just keep his mind off his own sorrow by sharing with him what has been in her mind.

“Clarke the doctor! She thinks we’re engaged”

Lincoln chuckles “Us? Really? I’m flattered but what made her think that?”

“Well, I introduced you as my partner last night” Lexa shrugs “I guess that’s why she assumed we’re a thing”

“And why didn’t you correct her?” Lincoln asks curious.

“I was going to do it but she was naked and I was ogling her-“

“Wait a minute, the annoying doctor as you called her was naked? What did I miss?”

“A lot but not what you think, she slammed the door at my face twice today” Lexa replies.

“She’s into you, Lexa. I’m telling you” Lincoln says sarcastically.

“Yeah, head over heels” Lexa quips back with a smile remembering how beautiful and alluring Clarke was when she opened the door for Callie only a towel wrapped around her, her skin still wet and her blonde hair too and what  she liked the most is the blush on her cheeks that made her look even more beautiful.

“You desperately need to get laid” Lincoln says seeing how frustrated and thoughtful Lexa became after mentioning her naked neighbor.

Lexa only hums in agreement as she cannot deny it, she needs to get laid and more exactly she needs, wants Clarke but she cannot let him know. She drinks her beer and leaves.

 

* * *

 

After everyone left, Clarke and Raven managed to clean the dishes and tidy the apartment before getting in the couch and cuddling. Clarke tell Raven about the incident of the evening when Callie arrived and Lexa again saw her naked post masturbation. Raven laughs heartedly at Clarke’s dorkiness.

“How can you be such a dork? Fighting someone then masturbating and getting off while thinking about her?” Raven asks in disbelief.

“She’s hot, shut up” Clarke defends.

“But then why did you fight?” Raven asks confused.

“I don’t know Rey. She’s… irritating, judgmental and so damn hot. Did I tell you she was in sport shorts all sweaty and sexy?”

Raven giggles “Yeah, twice”

Just as Clarke is about to go to bed, her phone buzzes. It is a message from Callie.

 

**_Callie: We need to stop fucking around FuckinGriffin_ **

****

Clarke reads Callie’s text then starts typing her answer when she got another one.

 

**_Callie: No matter how a good fuck you’re, sorry!_ **

****

**_FuckinGriffin: Redemption?_ **

****

**_Callie: And I need to change your name on my phone!_ **

**_Callie: It’s not a God’s intervention, just Arizona ;)_ **

****

Clarke reads Callie’s texts and does not know how to react. She hates Dr.Robbins and she is not pleased to lose her fuckbuddy because she has no can she can trust enough to have what she has with Callie. In the other hands, she is confused and intrigued to know what is her contact name in Callie’s phone, fuckbuddy, blondie?

 

**_FuckinGriffin: ?_ **

****

Hardly a minute later she receives a screenshot from her with her contact name ‘FuckinGriffin’ like she likes to call her. She shows Raven the screenshot and they burst in laughter.

“She is a savage, I like her” Raven comments tipsily then adds “She’s abosolutely right. You’re a FuckinGriffin who masturbates at a woman she hates and barely know”

“And she’s engaged” Clarke adds.

“You’re officially a slut my dear” Raven says then quickly catches on her best friend’s words “Engaged?”

“Yeah, the hot tattooed guy. Lincoln” Clarke answers.

“They’re not” Raven sighs.

“Yes, they’re” Clarke insists and Raven again contradicts her “No, he’s with Octavia”

“Ow” Clarke lets out “I’m going to miss you, Raven. He’ll end you. You fucked his girlfriend’s brain out”

“I didn’t know. Well, I did but…not before the two first orgasms” Raven admits.

“Two first! Damn” Clarke replies “I wish I’d Alexandria at least once! She’s single and I didn’t take my chance”

Raven clears her throat “At least try to be concerned, I’m in trouble”

“Come on, Rey. Since when was it a problem for you to sleep and leave?” Clarke asks confused.

“She’s different” Ravn blurs out “She’s addictive, Clarke. I don’t what she did to me but I…I felt good when with her. I kissed her and I didn’t feel bad about it”

“I don’t know what to say!” Clarke lets out surprised by her best friend’s confession. If she managed to kiss Octavia without feeling bad about it and Finn, it means that she is moving on and that Octavia may succeed to save her best friend’s happiness.

“What shall I do?” Raven asks defeated.

“Correction, what shall we do?” Clarke says then adds “Maybe we should talk with them”

“It’s not an option for me” Raven sighs shaking her head “at least not so soon. I’m still…frazzled”

“Why don’t we invite them for dinner some time?” Clarke suggests.

“I don’t think it would be a regular dinner. Can you imagine the four of us acting weird around each other?”

“I know” Clarke lets out with a huff “But we gotta do something to fix things if I ever want to get in Alexandria’s pants”

“Clarke!” Raven lets out not believing what she is hearing “You’re such a horny slut”

“Says the one who spent a night fucking” Clarke fires back.

“What can I do? I’m a sex-overachiever” Raven grins “If you want, I can help you”

“What? Shut up you’re drunk”

“Ok, then I guess you don’t want to know where you can approach the sweaty sexy Alexandria”

“What are you talking about?” Clarke asks confused.

“No, I’m not giving up data without something in return” Raven jokes and Clarke takes a cushion and throws it at her “Talk”

“Alright, alright. She owns the nightclub The Grounders. You go there, put a sexy dress and you get her”

“Never” Clarke shakes her head “I don’t want her to see me only when I’m pulling the slut outfit. She has seen enough. I have to do it right this time, are you with me?”

"Of course. What do you have in mind?" Raven straightens herself position, crossing her legs and looks attentively at Clarke.

“I stick to my first idea, a dinner. There’s nothing more classy and serious, don’t you think”

“That’s a terrible idea. A dinner sounds desperate, a coffee would seem less ‘ _I need to get laid_ ’ if you wanna do it right” Raven suggests.

Clarke squints her eyes for a moment thoughtfully before agreeing “Yeah, you’re right. But how do I do that?” She asks before explaining “I work in a hospital at irregular hours”

“Goodness, Clarke! Do you ever listen to what I say? Grounders duh!”

Clarke smiles at Raven happily “What would I do without you?” She leans closer to her best friend and places a kiss on her nose “Do you want to talk about Octavia?”

Raven’s smile falls, she shakes her head silently and Clarke insists “I know it’s too soon and you don’t wanna talk about it but please, do it for me”

It takes Raven a moment to start talking "She is straight, she is confused, she is adorable, she is undeniably sexy and her perfume! God, I swear it was her perfume that attracted me first. All I wanted to do is hug her and breathe her in, Clarke. It’s crazy how attracted I was to her. It never happened to me, not even with Finn”

“Talk to her then! Fight for her, don’t let her go” Clarke says and Raven shakes her head “I can’t. I can’t, Clarke. I’m a mess right now and if she ever was into women and out of the closet, I can’t be with her. Not now, not yet. It won’t be fair for her, I’m not ready…I still have nightmares, I’m still in love with Finn” Raven pauses for a moment before continuing.

“I’m lost, Clarke. My place is not a home anymore. It’s just…cold walls and most of the time I’m drunk. My work is degrading, I don’t even know how they’re keeping me”

Clarke's cheeks are full of tears while Raven is talking. What had become of Raven, her best friend who always was full of joy and hope? The death of Finn broke her. She is into pieces, some of them are six feet under.

Clarke keeps silent and all she can think of is taking Raven to bed after an exhausting talk. She knows how it is not easy for Raven to tell her the way she is feeling, she has been there after her father’s death and the only person who were by her side and stick with her is Raven.

“Move in with me, Rey!” Clarke lets out but Raven does not answer acting like she did not hear her.

“I know you’re awake. My place is big enough for the two of us. Leave that place, it’s only holding you down, it’s full of memories that are gone now” Clarke says hoping to convince her best friend.

“I can’t, I’m not ready” Raven replies flipping over facing her best friend.

After a moment, Clarke suggests something else “You don’t have to sell it. If you don’t feel comfortale enough with me here, you can go back there, what do you think?”

Raven sighs and whispers “I’ll think about it” before falling asleep.

 

The next morning, Clarke gets out early for work and meets Octavia walking out of her apartment.

“Good morning, Octavia”

“Morning, Clarke” Octavia replies coldly trying to discourage Clarke to have any ideas about having a conversation with her.

“How are you?” Clarke asks politely despite the cold tone Octavia used.

“Fine, thanks. You?” She asks back.

“Great, thank you for asking. Is Alexandria home? Awake?” Clarke answers and Octavia quickly answers “No, sorry. I’ve to go” and rushes to the elevator without waiting for Clarke, she lets the doors close clearly she does not want to talk to her.

Clarke looks at her neighbor’s door for a moment thoughtful then writes a post-it, she thinks about leaving it on the door but then she slides it under the door instead.

 

* * *

 

"Hey, are you still up for tonight?" Callie asks with a thrilled voice.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world" Arizona replies with a smile.

"What do you want to do? I mean where?"

"Surprise me!" Arizona winks at Callie.

"Is it Ok, if we stay in?" Callie asks

"I thought you wanted to..." Callie interrupts Arizona saying "I don't want a date, a regular date Arizona...I told you before I am bad at dating and you’re not bad and I want to make it good because you’re good. You deserve good"

"Oh" Arizona stares for a moment surprised at Callie’s words concludes "Alright, just text me the address and I will be there" She gives her a charming smile, leans in and places a soft kiss on Callie’s lips before leaving her clueless.

 

**********

 

 

Lexa wakes up and grabs her phone and texts Octavia remembering that she has an important job interview today.

 

**_Lexa: How did it go?_ **

****

**_Octavia: Good but the competition is a serious one_ **

**_Octavia: Are you still home?_ **

****

**_Lexa: Yeah, why?_ **

****

**_Octavia: Let’s meet for a coffee._ **

**_Octavia: FYI Lincoln will be there too_ **

 

**_Lexa: Be there in 20 minutes._ **

****

Lexa puts her phone down and starts tiding the apartment first before getting ready at her pace not wanting to be at the coffee earlier than needed knowing that her friends will be late. While she is walking in the living-room she notices something by the door.

She grabs the post-it and smiles reading, it was nothing she was expecting.

 

> **_You should come to the hospital_ **
> 
> **_to get your stitches checked,_ **
> 
> **_they looked infected._ **
> 
> **_And we should start over and_ **
> 
> **_Stop bumping into each other_ **
> 
> **_In inappropriate conditions_ **
> 
> ****
> 
> **_Ps: Sorry :)_ **
> 
> **_xoxo Clarke_ **

 

 

She smiles at the hand writing, which is rather a neat one unlike the stereotype of doctors' handwriting. ‘ _This would be interesting_ ’ She thinks to herself, she wanted to start over but it each time she tried, she blurted something that ended up making things worse.

Lexa meets her best friend in their usual café and Lincoln joins them not long after. They order their drinks before and Lexa takes the post-it Clarke left her and put it on the table. They read it and Lincoln is the first one to comment about it.

"Told you, she’s so into you Lexa" He points out.

"The injury is just an excuse for her to get into your pants" Octavia teases her best friend.

"What do you think? Should I go?" Lexa asks.

"Definitely...No way" her two friends reply simultaneously. Octavia looks at Lincoln for a moment then he adds "Why not Octavia. Both are single, they should mingle"

"It is not enough, just...Lexa, it is a bad idea" Octavia lets out.

"You’re not helping guys" Lexa says confused.

"I’m leaving" Octavia lets out and leaves without saying anything else.

She left because she could not manage to argue about the subject with Lincoln or around him, not after what they have been through together this week. Rushing into a relationship for the sole reason that they both are single, is a bad idea. After all, she and Lincoln got together for almost the same reason and one of them ended up hurt. The moment she gets to the door of the cafeteria, she finds Raven getting in.

"Oh Hey" Raven lets out surprised.

It takes Octavia a moment to recollect herself and greet her back with a smile then they both stare at each other silently each one waiting for the other to say something.

The air becomes tense and weird around them and Raven smiles weakly at Octavia before walking away to order her coffee. Octavia hesitates for a moment whether to go talk with Raven or not especially that Lincoln is in the same café. She does not want to hurt him and at the same time she does not want to make Raven feel like a one nightstand either.

Regardless of her indecision, she owes her a talk. She does not want to lose her and despite Lincoln staring, Octavia takes the initiative and follows Raven outside when she took her coffee and was leaving. She grabs her wrist and stops her, Raven turns back and sighs “We don’t have to do this, Octavia. I get it”

Octavia is taken aback by Raven’s coldness and her tone which was not a neutral one, she lets go of her wrist and says “Oh…I just wanted to let you know that you forgot your underwear at my place the other day. You should step by to get them back”

Raven nods and resumes her path to her car without adding anything else, Octavia does not give up and continues to follow her and just as Raven is about to get in her car, she lets out of nowhere “I want you Raven”

Raven turns back and looks at Octavia not believing what she just said and that she continued to follow her. She looks behind her shoulders to check if Lincoln is coming then shakes her head “I’m not doing this”

“I meant it, I want you” Octavia says insisting “All of you, not just the sex part. I never felt what I did with you…I…it just clicked” Raven mumbles “I know I’ve no clue what I’m doing…I’ve never been with a woman but I want you. I want to be with you” She insists and Raven feels her heart burning to ashes.

There is a moment of silence that felt like an eternity for Octavia. Raven stares at her then asks “Are you sure?”

"No but we should give it a try at least. We’re worth it, don’t you think?” Octavia asks and Raven does not know what to answer, she keeps staring blankly at her.

“I know you’re worth it, Raven" Octavia adds confidently this time.

Raven feels her heart tickling in her chest at her words, she feels a sudden joy enveloping her heart. She feels the urge to pull the woman in a searing kiss, she wants to breathe her, and to feel her in her arms.

Her lips finally twitch in a discreet smile, she closes the distance and cups Octavia’s beautiful face in her hands and lets her heart take control. Octavia deepens the kiss by putting more pressure before Raven break the kiss and takes her ahnds off her face.

It takes Octavia a moment to open her eyes, not wanting to watch Raven walk away or find out that it was just a dream. She opens them only when she hears Raven’s chuckles.

“Have a date with me or I don’t know, give me a chance” Octavia asks boldly.

This is it. This is what Raven was trying to avoid, she cannot be fully into a relationship. She can do something easy, not a relationship let along one ‘ _in the closet’_ type of relationship and above everything, she is not her full self now. She is broken and she will end up even more broken if she ever gets in something serious with Octavia.

“I can’t, I’m sorry” She lets out with a strangled voice trying not to cry “I need time, Octavia. We both need time and I don’t want ruin something we can have just for the sake of passionate sex” Raven explains painfully not daring to meet Octavia’s eyes.

Just as she finishes she turns back, gets in her car and leaves Octavia standing on her own eyes filled with unshed tears. Even if she understands Raven’s words, she does not want to accept them. She wants Raven, more than that she needs her now that she knows what it feels like to be into someone. She doubts she will ever click with someone as she did with her. She never did before.

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Later that day;**

 

**_Callieope: Get out! I’m waiting at the Hospital's entry…on a bench._ **

**_Callieope: My ass is freezing. Hurry up._ **

****

**_Arizona: Give me 5 minutes._ **

 

Callie reads Arizona's text with a bright smile on her face, she cannot believe she is going on a date with Arizona. She does not believe she is going on a date, she puts her phone back in her pocket of her jacket and waits impatiently for her date to show up.

As promised, Arizona finds Callie waiting for her outside in a bench, she smiles at her and flirts "You’re even hotter with a leather jacket"

"You’ve seen nothing yet" Callie lets out arrogantly.

“So? Where are you taking me?" Arizona asks as she hooks her arms with Callie's while walking.

"You’ll see. I think you gonna like it" Callie says giddily.

"Are we just going to have a walk in a freezing night?" Arizona jokes wanting to know where Callie is taking her.

"No, we’re almost there. Look" Callie points out an outdoor skating rink.

Arizona lets out a breath then smiles "Perfect, now give me the skates...I hope you brought skates"

"Of course I did" Callie replies.

The two women spend part of the night skating together then when Callie asks Arizona "What do you want for dinner?" The sassy blonde surgeon replies “Anything you want Callie, as long as I am with you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the mistakes, English is not my first language.


End file.
